How did this happen? Weren’t they just born yesterday? Don’t get me wrong, some stages and days seemed like they went on for a lifetime. But whether good or bad, the days, the months, the years have flown by.
You know when they say “don’t wish time away because before you know it they’ll be grown.” I actually took heed when people said this … even on those seemingly impossible days. I was running on empty in terms of sleep and patience … even then, I made a conscious effort not to wish them away. Because as people warned, in no time we’d be asking “weren’t they just babies yesterday?”
Now they’re in Junior Kindergarten! How are they old enough to be in school? To wear backpacks bigger than they are? To make sure they eat all of their lunch and pack it back into their lunch bag? To zip up their own zippers and pull on their own boots? Well to my surprise they were ready. I mean really ready. No tears, barely kissed me goodbye and when they come home guess what they play?… school!
We always want to raise strong children. Smart, healthy little beings who are able to adapt to any situation…and then when it happens a little part of you aches for them to want you, to need you. And it’s not that they don’t, but NOW what do I do? I think I’M the one who wasn’t ready.
I quit my career to be home with them. For all but 6 months of their 4.5 years I was with them day in and day out. It was me and them against the world. It still is, but now I’ve sent them out into the world to learn, to grow and I’m left here…to have a hot coffee and uninterrupted conversations. Which is glorious! But I miss them terribly.
Even the dog misses them. When he hears a child yell at the park his ears perk up and he has to do a double-take to see if it’s ‘his girls’.
I do find now that when they’re home and come to me for something; to help them colour, to read a book, to ask a question, I make more time to do these little things. Things that might not seem important on the surface, but I now think about the innocence of it rather than as an interruption. All I can think about is that they’re coming to me because they love me, they trust me, they look to me for guidance, and now that they’re learning about the world from others, I’m going to hold tight onto any moments I have to help shape them.
So trust me when I say; in those moments of chaos, of frustration, of sleep deprivation … don’t wish time to pass too quickly. In the blink of an eye, even though you see your little baby walking through the doors of the classroom for their very first time, the reality is that they grew into a big kid overnight.